A Nymph Without Mercy
XXIII

Mairi was tired ofbeing alone. Twice now this day her bond-mate had left her and while sheunderstood his reasons—truly she did—there was nothing to do. The room itself was more luxurious than she had ever imagined,and she did enjoy curling up in one of the soft chairs and watching the firedance and crackle at her, but even these comforts could not replace an actualperson for company.

It left too much timefor thinking, and that only led to more tears.

She was not unhappy.

At least, she triedto convince herself she was not. Garrick loved her and was attentive andcareful with her, and she did indeed feel cherished by his affections. But whenhe was not close, distracting her with his touches and words she found herherself remembering when there was more. Sisterlingsto titter and chase through the ample forests, trees to whisper with about thehappenings of the wood, and a feeling of home.

While she tried toremind herself that her home was now Garrick and she would be content whereverhe was, she caught herself longing for more.

And that was adangerous thing.

She recalled tryingto explain to Garrick once that sisterlings were not in fact born of her adar and amé, but merely sprouted in the same season. He had still worn hismask then but still she could tell that his brow furrowed. At the time she hadwondered if that little line would appear between his eyes like her father’swhen she was being particularlytroublesome. But she could not see and she could not smooth away his perplexitywith a touch of her finger—no matter how she might wish to.

She released awearied sigh and kept herself from glancing at the door yet again. She closedher eyes and allowed her mind to replace their bond, reminding herself why herloneliness was worth something more. For her to be home would have meant thatshe would not be with her Garrick—and she would never choose that. Not freely.

A knock at the doorinterrupted her musings, and she eagerly ran to answer it, glad that she haddonned her dress once more. Even though she might not have minded being nudefor a while longer, she doubted Garrick would appreciate others seeing what washis to enjoy.

The serving girl wasonce more at the door, this time a blush already staining her cheeks and a muchsmaller tray in her hands laden with a similar pot to the one that begot teaonly that morning. “May I come in, m’lady?”

Mairi blinked buttook a step backward, not expecting any to approach her while Garrick was gone,although she found herself intensely grateful for the distraction. “Of course.”

The girl sat the trayupon the low table, and stared at the floor, her lower lip firmly between herteeth. “I’m... It’s not my place, and I know that. But...” Her eyes flickeredto the closed door and she released a measured breath. “You are not from thisland, that is easy to see. And I was hoping...”

Mairi glanced at theteapot, wondering if it would be rude to indulge in a cup while the girl foundher missing words.

“Oh, pardon m’lady!Would you care for a cup?”

Mairi smiled andnodded, and watched her put the same amount of spoonfuls and dashes that Garrickhad done. “How did you know how to make it? Is there some servant magic thattells you?”

The girl laughedsoftly and shook her head. “Nay. But a good servant is an observant one, and Inoticed how much was missing this mornin’. You husband didn’t look like one forsugar and cream.”

Mairi wondered if sheshould be offended for him, but decided her time would be better spent sippingat her tea so as not to waste the serving girl’s efforts. “What is your name?”

She gave a quickcurtsy. “Bonnie, m’lady.”

“Did my husband sendyou?”

Bonnie sighed andthis time stood a little straighter. “Might I be forward, m’lady? I haven’t gotmany I can talk to that wouldn’t get me in trouble.”

Mairi cocked her headto the side. “And you think that I would not?”

She shrugged. “Youmight, I supposed, but... things are changing, or at least my...” Bonniehalted, looking at the ground once more.

“Perhaps you wouldlike to sit down.” She was glad that she had taken Garrick’s chair for her ownfor she did not think she would like to see another where he rightfully shouldhave been. Part of her longed for this girl’s confidence as it meant relatingto another female person—something she had not experienced in too long. But shedid not want to disappoint Garrick or his world’s sense of comportment, so shereminded herself firmly to remain calm and not to surrender to overexcitement.

Bonnie took one moredeep breath before looking at Mairi directly. And once the words began sheseemed to have difficulty stopping them. “I married above my station. By quitea bit actually. By all rights he shouldn’t have done it—he should have had somenoblewoman or someone who could be queen with him when the time came. Not...me. I’m no one special, just a kitchen girl who drops too many things and tripsover the cats stealing scraps and...”

Mairi raised a hand,must as she had seen her elders do when they wordlessly commanded silence. “Doyou care for him? And him for you?”

Bonnie nodded, butalready tears pooled in her eyes. “You must think me foolish, when Cyrus is sogood to me and you probably had no choice in your own marriage. Was yours analliance? He must have done something important to secure your hand.”

Mairi sighed. “Do notassume you know of my bonding. I love my... husband... dearly. People are wrongto assume he is cruel.”

Bonnie eyed herdubiously. “He threatened me before he left. He told Cyrus that if any harmcame to you that he would have my head.”

Her protectivebond-mate, always so dramatic. She did not know at what point such promises ofviolence ceased to surprise her. But now as she heard yet another perception ofGarrick’s dismal behaviour and not-so-idle threats, she only found herselfgrowing weary. None knew him as she did. And perhaps that made her foolish andsomeday he would disappoint her, but she knew that he was capable of mercy andof restraint—for he showed both to her regularly and without ceasing.

“We have few alliesin the world. He does what he must to ensure my safety.”

Bonnie appearedunconvinced but nodded regardless. “As you say, m’lady.” They were silent for amoment, both too uncomfortable with talk of Garrick to attempt more conversation.Mairi would not relent and give her leave to speak freely of him, but shesupposed that it was absurd to think that he would be as kind and gentle toeveryone as he was to her.

“Forgive me, youwished to speak of something of import and I interrupted. What has you sotroubled?”

She fiddled with herhand, roughened by work and scrubbing and so unlike anything Mairi had seen ona female. “What if you knew that, even though you loved someone with your wholeheart, that they would have a better life without you? Even though some know of our marriage, it could still beeasily forgotten...”

How many times had Garricksaid something so remarkably similar? No matter how she pledged herself hefound himself unworthy—and it only resulted in hurting the both of them all themore.

And any bristles thathad formed during this conversation smoothed, and Mairi found herself pouring acup of tea for this girl—though she only gestured for her to add whataccoutrements would please her for she refused to presume—and offering her whatadvice she could.

“You must stopthinking of yourself in such manner. If your mate loves you as you say, thenyou should recognise how much you hurt him by suggesting that your bond couldbe so easily broken.” She thought of her poor adar, forced to spend the rest of his days without either the tiesof his beloved or even of fatherhood, and she felt her eyes grow moist. “Everyday you have with him is a gift, and you should not squander it. At the end ofyour days you would only lament not having accepted him sooner—and I would notwish that regret on anyone.”

Bonnie took a longsip of tea and appeared close to tears herself. “You’re very wise. The kingoffered him any other bride of his choosing, but still he stood by me.” Sheglanced at Mairi, her fear plain. “I do not fear that your husband might cuffme. I fear that the king will ask him to kill me and that he shall accept.”

Mairi blinked insurprise, the thought never having entered her mind. But even as the doubtthreatened to take hold, she pushed it away fiercely. Her bond-mate haddiscernment. His distaste of this ruler was clear, and she believed, wholly andtruly, that he would not allow his desire for those strange metal pieces tooverride his convictions.

“I cannot speak forhim, but I know of no such plan. And should he ask my opinion I would dissuadehim from doing so.”

Bonnie gave a smalllittle smile and nodded. “That’s more than I had before at least.”

They sat in silence amoment longer, each deep within their own thoughts and replaceing little else tosay on the matter. It bothered her that she could not offer a promise—that hewould not do exactly as she feared. But she had learned her Garrick wasunpredictable, and she would not like to later learn that she was lying.

But she did wish tospeak to him about it.

Bonnie finallyresettled her empty cup upon the tray and smoothed down her apron, although Mairirather thought she did so to sooth her nerves rather than because the fabricrequired it.

“I was also told tocome here to prepare you for tonight’s feast, but I’m not sure what I couldpossibly do to make you anymore beautiful.”

Mairi’s browfurrowed. “Was there not a feast only yesterday? Do your people truly have somuch to celebrate?”

She hummednoncommittally. “I think ‘tis only a reason for men to drink and indulge inmerrymaking after they’ve had their sport all day. It makes us terrible busy inthe kitchens though and I shall be glad when all’s ended.”

Mairi allowed her totake her finished cup and tidy the tray, but she was left feeling horriblyuncertain of her course. Garrick had specifically told her that he would beback before she was forced to make any attempt at identifying foodstuffswithout him—and surely that meant he would accompany her to yet another feast.

She had already beenprey to the king’s lascivious comments once, and she hardly relished thethought of doing so again.

Bonnie waitedpatiently for her to rise, but Mairi finally began to protest. “I do not thinkit would be appropriate for me to attend without my... Garrick. He left noinstructions for me to go...” She looked to their bond, hoping to receive someindication that he was already about to burst into their room. But there wasnothing but the welcome tingling that assured her of his continued health andaffection for her, and she released it with a sigh.

“M’lady, I will ofcourse defer to your wishes. But please know that I was told by Cyrus to bringyou, and your lord husband charged him with your care in his absence. He wouldnot suggest it if he did not think it best.”

There was anundercurrent of dread in her tone and Mairi immediately felt guilty. Garrickhad said this king was dangerous, and if the man he trusted to keep her safesuggested something and she ignored it...

Garrick had said Bonniewould pay the price. And she had a right to be frightened.

“My dresses will notbe ready until the morrow.”

The girl nodded. “Youlook perfect as you are. I’m not trained to be a lady’s maid, and I think I’dbe anxious if you actually needed my help!”

Mairi smiled softly,her mind too preoccupied to be truly grateful for the compliment. Sheremembered her sisterlings as they giggled and helped one another with theirhair. It never seemed to tangle as she had seen the mortal’s do, but still theyliked to pick wildflowers and twine them in their tresses, declaring oneanother the Nymphlin Queen until the sun set.

And suddenly shelonged for such companionship, and before this curious little maid could scurryaway Mairi reached out and grasped her arm. “Surely you know of braids.”

In the end she didnot care if it was far more simple than anything the other dyrads would havedone. Bonnie had managed a small crown of braids from her temples leading toone long plait, and the mere action of connectedness, of returning to one ofher great joys in her sapling years made Mairi feel just a bit lighter—even ifshe was to face a banquet alone.

And she pushed awaythe thought that it should have been her bond-mate that helped her tend toit—yet another dream she had fostered since her younger days.

Bonnie led herthrough the halls and gestured for her to enter, although she hung back andinched closer to a hidden doorway that Mairi assumed led to the kitchens ofwhich she had referred. “Cyrus is in there, m’lady. He’ll watch over you. Hislove hangs in the balance too.”

And with that shedisappeared.

Mairi took a deep andsteadying breath and entered.

If possible the roomwas even more boisterous than the night before. One corner seemed to house menwho scowled into their cups and argued amongst themselves while the restbellowed and guffawed about rightful victories and rematches that would takeplace in the morning.

Mairi wanted to be home.

But she forced herlimbs forward and tried not to look as desperately frightened as she felt. Therewere seats at the high table but she did not truly wish to dine there—not whenthe king and his insinuations would also be so near. So she began to creeptoward a darker, quieter place at the back of the room only to have a stronghand grab at her arm.

She jerked awayharshly, only to be immediately released. “My apologies, Lady Mairi, I did notmean to frighten you. But you are to be seated by me.”

It was the man whohad asked to speak to Garrick, and she presumed he must also be Bonnie’smate—the one that was supposed to keep her safe.

And his idea ofsafety meant leading her toward thedanger.

He must have seen herscepticism for he was quick to reassure her. “I know, you would prefer to awaityour husband in your rooms. But if your absence had been noted, especially withit known that your husband was seen exiting the gates, I feared my uncle wouldhave sought your company alone. You would not have wished for that, I think.”

She shuddered. “No, Iwould not.”

He smiled at herunderstandingly and offered her his arm. “Then let us try to salvage thisevening as best we can.”

She glanced at theproffered limb and remembered Garrick’s words the first time he had led her insuch a way. It simply meant that a knight was showing some care and gentilityto a lady and was being respectful—but to her it spoke of an intimacy that sheonly wished to feel with her bond-mate.

And such overruledany fear of rudeness.

So instead she wavedhim forward as nicely as she could and he nodded, giving no indication that hewas insulted by her refusal.

“Well done, Cyrus, Iwas afraid we had lost our lovely guest. That husband of hers seems to be keeping her sequestered in their rooms.Odd for one that does not seem interested in making her a proper wife.”

Mairi’s cheeks turnedcrimson and she had to bite her tongue to keep from angrily retorting that herbond-mate was most certainly attentivein his affections and had every interest in sealing himself to her. Repeatedly.As true and loving mates should.

But due to herprevious reaction Garrick had been given cause to worry, so instead she merelysat in the chair that Cyrus provided, this time positioning himself between herand the king’s unwanted attentions.

“Uncle, you haveembarrassed her. If he wishes to keep her a maid until she is receptive to his advances then he is tobe commended, not ridiculed.”

Drostan glared atCyrus over the rim of his goblet. “If one was not careful, they could think youseek to censure me.”

Cyrus gave Mairi anapologetic glance, one she barely caught at all for she was more interested instudying the empty plate before her.

“My apologies, Uncle.I am sure you are wise in all things.”

He managed to soundmore sincere than she expected, and the king seemed relatively appeased for hedemanded no punishment. Mairi did not know what she would do if things turnedsour so quickly, and she quickly tugged at their bond, urging Garrick to returnto her all the more swiftly.

“And where is yourcompanion, Lady Mairi? The guards mentioned that he absconded with one of myhorses in a very hasty manner. Did you two quarrel and he has left you in mycharge?”

Mairi swallowed andalthough she felt impolite for doing so, kept her gaze lowered to the foodinstead of acknowledging him directly. “I do not know what errand demanded hisattention, but he promised to return soon. He is a good husband.”

Her nose wrinkled atthe whole carcass that was artfully arranged upon a large platter. She found itcrude and almost barbaric to display it so. She understood that these peoplerequired nourishment—truly she did—and she would not deprive a hungry child ameal even at the sacrifice of one of the woodland creatures. But this wentbeyond merely sustenance, and she desperately wanted her Garrick to return andguide her to what foods were safe.

Few resembled whatshe had eaten before, but further along the line of heaping portions lay a bowlof fruit, and her stomach made it clear that such would be acceptable.

Only it was to theleft of the king and wholly out of reach for either her or for Cyrus.

She folded her handsand silently told her stomach it would simply have to wait, for there waslittle she could do to help it that would not put the rest of her person intodanger.

“My dear, you are noteating! Is our humble fare not to your tastes?”

She swallowedthickly, eyeing his full plate. “I am sorry, your... kingliness. My husbandusually provides my meals.” What did one call a king that was not your king?

His eyebrows rose ina mimicry of surprise. “He sounds like a very controlling man that he would noteven allow you to pick out your own supper. Are you certain you are...satisfied with him?”

Cyrus gave her awarning glance as he began filling his own plate, the tone heavily laced withimplication lost on neither of them.

How to explain? Her Garrickdid not do these things to stay her desires in favour of his own, but insteadto show his attentiveness to her needs. But this man did not want to understand so instead she took abracing breath, her hands clasped tightly in her lap. “If you would be so kindas to pass the strawberries, I would be very grateful.”

Instead of simplyoffering them to Cyrus to place next to her as she had expected, the Drostanrose and picked up the small dish and approached her chair. His arms formed acage about her as he leaned forward, making a very great show of slowlyallowing the ripe fruit to tumble from the bowl and onto her waiting plate.

Mairi looked at Cyruspleadingly for help and he appeared equally torn.

She wished to stand,to push him away so she could no longer feel his hot breath pressing on hercheek as he made a mockery of what could have been a tender action betweenmates. He was not quite touching her, not fully, but she felt tears prickle hereyes at his close proximity.

And then he leaned inclosely to whisper in her ear, and she squeezed her eyes closed and pretendedshe had not heard him.

“You could be aqueen, Lady Mairi. You would not have to travel and muck about with a man whodoes not appreciate what a treasure is within his grasp. Tell me you consentand I shall annul the marriage that was foisted upon you and I shall fulfil allof your wildest imaginings.”

He pulled away butnot before allowing his lips to linger at her ear, and she could not containthe shiver of disgust that rippled through her. Her stomach, once desirous offood, now protested the mere thought of taking even a bite, and she looked downat her hands and wished to disappear as she felt his hand pat her shoulder.“Think about it.”

She wished to standand scream at him that the suggestion repulsed her to her core—that she would never betray her Garrick in such amanner. But she did not know what would make the situation worse so sheswallowed her tears as best she could, and most importantly her anger, andwaited for her bond-mate to return and make her forget any of this terribleevening.

Cyrus leaned close, appearinggenuinely concerned. “Are you all right?”

Mairi shook her headslowly, certain that if she did not keep some rigid control, dangerous wordswould come tumbling out that she could not possibly retract. “I fear that allwill not be well until I am far from this place.”

And she had neverbeen more relieved in her life than when not a moment later, the wide andalarmed eyes of her Garrick met hers across the unruly hall.