Becoming Fae
Uncertainty and the Certain Future

There’s something to be said about knowing you were going to die sooner than expected. I didn’t have to guess when it was going to happen so much and that was both terrifying and oddly liberating. What bothered me was the vision I had in my dreams. The ones that, until now, I couldn’t really remember.

Fear was a monster that had no one form. Immail was used to the fear that was beaten by conditioning, training, yourself to be stronger. Clearly, my issues were more than that when Netiri started coaching me on them as well as honing my senses to regain some form of sight. Therapy was back on and it seemed like Mal was less murderous about this shrink than the last one. Poor Jacob.

Still, after a week, I wasn’t any better off than I was before. I still shuddered when I opened my eyes, only to see darkness, and no matter how hard I tried, I saw nothing at all.

I sighed as I turned my face to the warmth of the sun and closed my eyes. I imagined the colors of the dawn touching the sky and the way the early light touched the dew on the grass, making everything look like it was encrusted in jewels.

“There’s a lot of red in it this morning,” Mal said, his voice rough with sleep.

“I didn’t mean to wake you,” I replied.

“I tend to notice when you’re not with me, Fae,” he put his arms around my waist under my wings and kissed my cheek tenderly. “It just takes me a bit to pull out of sleep.”

“We’ll be back at the camp by mid-morning,” I said.

“How do you know that?” he chuckled.

“I can smell it,” I answered. “And I might have heard Naz last night.”

“Your other senses are getting sharper,” he hummed, letting me go, but pulling me down to sit between his legs so he could hold me again.

“I’m sick of darkness. And I have the rest of my short life with nothing to see,” I huffed.

“Don’t say that. We’re going to live a long, long life, Fae,” he gave me a squeeze.

“No, we won’t,” I scoffed. “But fine. Say we do. I’m going to miss everything.”

“Not if I tell you everything,” he said.

“Not the point, but thanks for trying,” I sighed. “No more sun sets or sunrises, no more moments of sitting and watching the sun reflected off the lakes or seeing the people that follow me feeling safe and happy again. Darkness aside, blindness blows.”

“That won’t last forever, though. Right? I mean, Netiri seems pretty certain that you’ll be able to see somehow,” he said.

“I’m getting nowhere fast,” I scoffed. “It takes years to be able to do that and, in case you missed the memo, we don’t have that long. Weeks. Months, perhaps, but not years.”

“You’re being a pessimist,” he chuckled. “The future isn’t set in stone, Fae. There’s always a chance that it all goes right for us.”

“I’m replaceing it hard to see that,” I replied with a soft sigh.

“I mean... You know.”

“Was that a blind joke?” I smirked over my shoulder at him, and he chuckled and kissed me gently.

“Too soon?”

“It was pretty great. Didn’t see it coming,” I replied, and he laughed, giving me another soft squeeze.

“The plus side of all of this is that you aren’t deaf, so you get to hear the horrible jokes. Harmon is great and all, but he has zero witty remarks and even less humor,” Mal said when I turned back towards the warmth.

“He’s adjusting to a new culture fairly well, I’d say. He’s going to have the worst time deciphering sarcasm when he learns to read lips, though,” I snorted.

“Well, if we’ve learned anything since he showed up, it’s that he’s resourceful. He’ll adapt.”

We sat in silence until I heard the rest of our group stirring as they woke up and began moving about. I knew that we would be leaving soon, and I wasn’t too keen on the idea of showing up blind.

“They are all counting on me,” I said quietly. “And now I’m severely disadvantaged going into a war that can easily encompass the entire Sidhe if I fail. So how am I supposed to face them now?”

“The same way you have since the first ones showed up. Openly. Honestly. With everything you have in your hands,” he replied. “You have an annoying way of making people like you, even when they try really hard not to.”

“You stood no chance, Tinkerbell,” I scoffed.

“Not even a little bit,” he chuckled. “And neither does anyone else.”

“How awkward is it going to be, walking in there and facing the same people that made my life hell in school?” I laughed.

“I bet they’re wondering the same thing,” he snorted.

Ben

“You have got to be kidding me,” I muttered, looking up as the conversation in the dining area dimmed. “What is she doing here?”

“Nothing good,” Blaine growled softly.

Most of the people in here right now were the fae that Heather had led to us from Earth. Several of them were from our high school and many of them were at the party when Victoria pushed Fae into the pool. Obviously, things had changed since then, judging from the glares she was getting from around the room.

“Wonder how the mighty ended up falling,” Blaine commented, going back to his food.

“She’s one of those people that peak in high school,” Heather answered, sitting beside me and grabbing some of my food. “Once they weren’t forced to be around her all the time, everyone started to see how little she actually mattered.”

“She’s still a bitch,” I growled.

“That’s an insult to canines,” Blaine snorted.

“I saw something you should be aware of,” Heather said, getting our attention. “It’s about Fae.”

“What is it now?” I sighed, rubbing my temples. I think I’m going to go gray at this rate.

“She’s going to die,” she said simply.

“What? When?” I asked.

“How?” Blaine followed up.

“I don’t know when, but she’s going to get stabbed through the back with a sword,” she answered. “Her own sword, as it turns out.”

“She doesn’t have one,” I frowned.

“Not yet, but she will. She’ll have many weapons, in fact, and she’ll be deadly with all of them by the time my vision comes to be,” she said.

“You always say that the future isn’t a sure thing,” I shook my head.

“The way I see visions is like looking at a faded photograph,” she said. “The more certain it is to happen, the more defined the vision is. This one was like looking at photo that had just been taken. I’m positive it will come pass exactly as I saw it and there’s no way to avoid it happening. Someone is going to kill Fae when she’s not even looking at them.”

“Did you see who it was?” Blaine asked.

“I did,” she nodded. “It was Malachi.”