Discovering Fae
What Do You Want?

Mal

Before we completed our Bond, I had wished I knew what was going on inside Fae. She always had a grip on her emotions on the outside, but her misfiring powers were proof that the waters weren’t as still as they looked.

Now, having a personal, inside look at what she was feeling, I was worried far more than before. The worst part was that I didn’t know what to do to help her aside from giving her a Jolly Rancher, which clearly wasn’t enough. All those times I listened to her when she told me what she felt, I heard every word and I took each one to heart but hearing the words and understanding what they really meant weren’t the same thing.

Now, I knew how far out of my depth I was, but even still, I wasn’t seeing the full picture. Not until I heard her screaming sob as a wave of fire blasted the building we were in. I felt the pain, the suffering, the guilt and I heard the rawness of each emotion in that scream. Every instinct told me to go to her, to sooth her and calm the storm I could feel inside of her through our Bond.

“Easy, son,” Quinn said, holding my arm and preventing me from running to her.

The flames had turned her clothes to ash and the soot and dirt that made the open center of the circular building covered her, her tears leaving black streaks on her face and dark spots where they fell.

“Raiz knows fire. Until he says it’s safe, staying away is best,” Quinn said when I turned to him.

“Let me go, Quinn,” I said, feeling my wings stiffen and vibrate with my hostility.

“You have a good heart, but use your head, boy,” his face darkened for a moment before he turned to his daughter. “Fae isn’t stable and with all of that power in her, she’s dangerous to be around, even for you.”

“She needs me, Quinn. Let me go,” I growled at him as Fae cried and Raiz put his hand on her back.

“Of course, she needs you,” he rolled his eyes. “But that’s your heart, not your head. If she flares again, she’ll kill you. Burn you enough to make you wish you were dead at any rate. Hurting your Bonded has ramifications not worth risking.”

“I’d never hurt her,” I snapped.

“I’m not talking about you hurting her,” he sighed and shook his head. “If she hurts you, even by accident, she feels your pain tenfold. Your head, Malachi. Use your head.”

“It’s physically impossible to harm your Bonded,” I frowned at him.

“Accidents happen. So does sabotage,” he replied. “You use too much of your heart and it’s bound to end up hurting my daughter.”

“She needs me,” I said, softly, looking out towards where she and Raiz were now talking.

“I know. She really does need you, but she needs to get a grip on herself first,” he sighed as a light rain began. Odd, since the skies were clear just an hour ago.

Whatever they were saying was said and Raiz left her there, on her knees in the ash and naked, staring after him like he just turned into an elephant. With a small jerk of his head, Raiz motioned that it was safe, and Quinn released me as another phoenix handed be a stack of clothes. I wasted no time as I ran from the building, sliding a little bit on my knees when I reached Fae.

“Are you okay?” I asked her, checking her arms and face for marks that shouldn’t be there before I remembered she was naked.

“Feeling a little foolish, but no worse for wear,” she smiled softly as I quickly looked away. “Seriously? You’ve literally seen me post-torture.”

“That was mid-rescue,” I held up the shirt.

“And you helped me when I couldn’t shower on my own,” she pointed out.

“Shh!” I looked towards where Quinn and I had stood moments ago to replace the space empty, thankfully. “Are you trying to get me skinned alive?”

She laughed softly as she took the shirt and pulled it over her head. While I knew she did it to make me or her father uncomfortable, I wasn’t blind to the small thrill that ran through her when she saw Quinn giving me a deadly glare. She had missed growing feeling a father’s protectiveness of his daughter when a guy comes around. Now that she had it, she was enjoying it by getting a reaction from the two of us.

“Mal?” she said after she pulled the pants on, and I turned to look at her uncertain face. “Did you mean it when you said you’d be beside me, no matter what I choose?”

“Always,” I nodded.

“Get me away from here,” she said quietly, and her eyes started to well up again. “Please, just take me away.”

I debated saying no for half a second before I took her in my arms and flew away with her. Quinn had just lectured me about not using my head, but right now, she wanted to be alone with me without reminders of what was waiting for us when we went back. From the way she was feeling right now, the ‘when’ was more like an ‘if’, though.

I flew us far away from Phoenix Hollow before landing beside a blue lake, the waters kept clean and clear by the water sprites that resembled dragonflies in and out of the water. With our feet on the ground, Fae stood on her toes and held on to me tighter, using me as an anchor while her mind spun around, blasting from one emotion to another so quickly, it was dizzying.

“It’s so much,” she said after five minutes of silence. “Too much.”

“It’s okay, Fae,” I turned my head to kiss her hair. “Take however long you need to work it out. We know what everyone else wants you to do. Now, figure out what you want to do. I don’t care what it is as long as we’re together.”

“Always,” she whispered on a sigh, sinking back to her feet and pulling away to look around us. “Where are we?”

“No clue,” I shrugged. “I zigzagged around after we left, so... If this lake is big enough to be on a map, I’d be shocked, and I didn’t see any smoke from houses or a village nearby either.”

“Won’t they be mad we’re disturbing them?” she looked at the water sprites as their dance around the water slowed with curiosity when they came near us.

“Most of the smaller water fae are timid and curious. So long as we don’t pollute their lake, I think we’ll be fine,” I pushed a lock of sooty hair off her ash covered face. “We should ask if it’s okay to take some of the water so you can clean up a little bit, if you want to stay here tonight.”

“Is it that late already?” she looked up at the sun.

“It’s mid-afternoon, but if you want to stay here, we need to replace a place we can sleep without tempting the sprites to see how long we can live underwater without air,” I said. “Timid and curious as water may be, sprites are still sprites and they’re a mischievous species.”

“Right,” she said, looking back to the water and the graceful, delicate movements of the sprites. “I never liked being near water when I sleep. Not being able to swim kind of takes the fun out of it, you know?”

“Alright. Where do you want to be, then?” I asked, turning her around so she could see better with her back pressed against my front.

She was quiet for a long time before she looked up towards a raise in the trees around us. It wasn’t a place that could be reached easily on foot, with rocky sides that were near enough to sheer to deter any attempt. It was like it had been a hill at one point, but someone took the sides off of it to make it look like a cliff.

“Hold on,” I lifted my wings, and her arms went around mine tightly as I took us up.

Finding it to be safe from most things dangerous, we started making a space ready to stay for the night. Fae cleared the ground and dug a pit to hold our fire, lining it with stones, while I collected fallen branches and tree limbs. When I came back, Fae had started building a shelter for us since we had left everything behind when we went to Phoenix Hollow.

“Just so you know,” I said, after I finished arranging the wood in the pit. “I’m terrible at starting a fire.”

She smirked and snapped her fingers, sending a spark of electricity into the nest of kindling and lighting an ember to be coaxed into life.

“My time with those creepy bats may have been mostly useless, but I did learn a few things,” she smiled and turned back to her task. “You know, we talked about a lot of things when I was getting ready for my Awakening, but I don’t think we really covered the kinds of things a Noble Fairy can do.”

“We didn’t?” I tilted my head.

“No. I mean, the other fairy races are pretty self-explanatory. Dark, light, fire, water, air. But the only one not obvious is the Noble fairy,” she said. “Why is that?”

“Well, we don’t really have a special magical skill, like the others do,” I said. “I mean, we’re good with illusions and barriers, like when I first started showing up at your house. But we’re pretty unremarkable in the magic department.”

“So, what makes you different, then?” she asked.

“Our wings.”

“That’s it? Physical appearance?” she looked over her shoulder at me.

“No,” I chuckled. “They’re stronger than other fairies. We fly faster for longer, and they can be used as a kind of blunt weapon, like a swan protecting its nest.”

“Angry jerks,” she muttered, and I chuckled. “So why the name, then? ‘Noble’ sounds superior. There has to be a reason, right?”

“Well, we also make pretty good fighters. We have sharper reflexes and are more agile. We can hold heavier weapons, too. Because we’re good in battles, we tend to have a decent handle on tactics, too,” I explained.

“Tinkerbell went warrior, huh?” she smirked at me.

“You could say that,” I gave her a look.

“Dad said that the Kings were some of the best. Does that mean you, too, or did you get left out because they were jerks?” she asked, finishing with the shelter.

“It was a topic of debate within the family, but my father made sure I was trained, just like any other King. Better, actually, since I wasn’t given much choice in what to do with my free time,” I put my legs out in front of me so she could sit between them and lean against me. “I was on a pretty tight leash for a long time. Once I Awakened, I was given more freedoms, since you can’t really cage a fairy on the ground for long without them going insane.”

“Really?” she looked over her shoulder at me.

“Most of the fae with wings are born to answer the call of the skies,” I nodded.

“What about Bruno?” she asked.

“Removing the wings makes it easier. That’s why you’ll replace most wingless fairies were crippled first,” I said, moving her hair aside and kissing her neck.

“Your mother wasn’t,” she said softly.

“No, she wasn’t,” I answered. “She was considered a criminal in that regard.”

“Because she fell in love,” she scoffed.

“Because she committed adultery,” I rolled my eyes. “My uncle did long before she did, but... being a male and the head of the family protected him.”

“Hypocrite,” she said.

“Yes, he was very much a hypocrite. But it wasn’t so much about gender. My mother was a female, so she could get pregnant. My uncle and father, on the other hand...,” I shrugged. “Even when my uncle fathered a child with a mistress, he could deny being the father. Women can’t do that.”

“Very archaic,” she shook her head.

“Fae are incredibly archaic,” I agreed.

“What happened to your father?” she asked. “Your mother lost her wings, but she wasn’t the only one involved.”

“He was marked,” I answered. “Not physically. It was pretty much being blacklisted. All of the things that come with being in a family unit were taken from him. The nice houses, the bank accounts and ease that came with them, all of the benefits of being a King.”

“Like you?” she looked at me again.

“No. I can never be a part of the family again. Not that I ever really was,” I shook my head and kissed he cheek. “Being marked and being cast out aren’t the same. He was marked and told he could come back, but only if he left my mother. He didn’t, so he remained marked.”

“So, how did he become head of the family if he was marked?”

“My mother died, which made the whole thing a moot point. And with my uncle dead, the family needed a leader. The next in line was my father,” I shrugged. “The elders didn’t want me involved, since they didn’t see me as a King to begin with, but that was part of the deal my father made. They wanted him and he wanted me.”

“He has a funny way of showing it,” she muttered.

She had met my father once before and she was not impressed with his fatherly care, since he was ready to throw her out like Bianca wanted until I told them we were Bonded. It’s left a lasting opinion on her that I, honestly, don’t care to fix much.

“You saw the picture I took of my mother, right?” I asked her and she nodded.

“You look almost exactly like her, but masculine,” she said, making me snort.

“My father really did love my mother, Fae. I think, if one of them had made a Call, they would have been Soul Bonded, like us,” I explained. “Now that I know what it feels like, I can’t blame him for being cold and distant with me.”

“When you put it like that,” she muttered, leaving the statement unfinished. After a moment, she looked at me again. “What difference does it make between the Caller and the Bonded that answers?”

“Usually, the one that makes the Call is the one that needs protection,” I answered. “I asked the same thing when I first met your parents.”

“So, if you had been in trouble and made the Call, it wouldn’t have made a difference?” she tilted her head. “For us, I mean.”

“It wouldn’t have worked. Apparently, it’s about personality, too. Between us, you’re the more vulnerable one,” I said and felt her anger and irritation. “Not weak, Fae. I don’t mean it in a bad way.”

“You better explain before you end up sleeping in the dirt tonight,” she glared at me.

“Every person that has ever made a Call and found a Soul Bond has one thing in common with all the others, according to your parents,” I said, quickly. “The Bonded is always the protector, the support, the anchor and the Caller is always the one that makes the decisions.”

“I’m not making decisions, Mal. I’m running away from them,” she rolled her eyes.

“And you made that choice without my input,” I pointed out.

“What if I asked for it? Would you give me your opinion?” she asked.

“There’s nothing you can ask me for that I won’t try to give you, Fae. That’s not the Bond talking, because I would have done that before I kissed you,” I answered.

“What do you think I should do?” she asked.

“No fair,” I chuckled. “I can’t tell you that and you know it. That’s something only you can decide.”

“But you can give me your thoughts on everything,” she sighed and leaned back against me again. “Maybe another view can give me some clarity.”

“Okay. Where do you want to start?”

“My parents. The title they hold that will be ours,” she huffed. “I’m the only other one with the heritage to rule. I can’t exactly say no to that.”

“It’s not impossible for them to have another child, you know,” I chuckled. “Your mom has a very long life ahead of her and since your dad is her Soul Bond, so does he, which means they can have children for decades still. Maybe even centuries, for all we know. You’re the only one, right now. Who knows what the future holds? You could have a sibling in a few years.”

“That’s... I didn’t think of that,” she said slowly. “I could be a sister. But I don’t know if I could just push this on this hypothetical sibling.”

“And dynasties come and go all the time. Maybe this is where this one ends and another begins,” I shrugged. “Being a leader is a great thing, but not one that you want to take if you don’t feel like you can do what’s necessary.”

“I don’t even know the first thing about being a ruler, but I don’t know if I want that kind of responsibility. I’d be the reason the entire Sidhe thrives or falters.”

“Not all of it. The Sidhe is ruled by your parents, yes, but most of this world is run by the clans and factions. Faeora, home of the fairies, is overseen by the Council and the Fairy Queen, but that’s been an empty title since Titania,” I explained. “She’s more like the representative that sees to the needs of her people.”

“Titania was real?” she asked, looking awed.

“As was Oberon,” I nodded. “Now that’s a tragic romance that far exceeds Romeo and Juliet.”

“I thought they hated each other,” she frowned.

“They did, but they also couldn’t stay apart. Titania and Oberon were classic ‘on again, off again’. Titania was a jealous woman, and hated that Oberon looked at other women, even if it was his own sister. Completely innocent, but to Titania, all she saw was another woman,” I explained.

“That’s toxic,” she relaxed against me some more and moved just a bit to get comfy.

“Oberon was the same way, only far more brutal. Titania harmed and occasionally killed those she thought were in the wrong, but Oberon? Nah. He destroyed them. Took them apart until nothing solid remained.”

“Gods, that’s disturbing,” she shuddered.

“Fairies are made to look innocent, but we are capable of some sick, twisted, disgusting things when provoked. Titania and Oberon were the worst, even for back then,” I nodded. “But their very natures were pitted against them from the start.”

“What do you mean?” she asked.

“Titania was a light fairy, born of Dawn’s first light on the longest day of the year, and Oberon was a dark fairy, born in the darkest hour of the darkest night of the year,” I explained. “It’s not unheard of for a dark and light fairy to live a happy life together, but Titania and Oberon were opposites in every way. They never should have stayed together but were just too stubborn to admit they weren’t good for each other.”

“No kidding,” she muttered.

We sat in silence as the fire burned lazily beside us and the sun slowly set. When Fae reached over and added more wood to the pit, she sighed and rubbed her temples.

“If I choose to run away, I’d never be able to hide. Raiz said glamour won’t work on me. That means I can’t blend in and going back to Earth? The tattoos are shocking, but not that big of a deal, but once I have wings? I’ll never be able to go back,” she said.

“Glamour is kind of like a two-part trick. First is the illusion. You still see the horns and the skin and the tails and the wings, but your mind is being told it sees something else. At least, that’s how it is for humans. But then there’s the physical problem. You can still feel everything as it should be. So, a kind of pocket is formed. Since fae travel between realms so easily, we know how the fabric of reality feels and can mimic it with our glamour,” I said, and she poked at the fire with a stick before adding it to the flames.

“None of that will work for me, though,” she said. “I mean, there’s not much on Earth that would make me want to go back often but having the option would be nice.”

“Illusions aren’t the same as glamour,” I pointed out. “Given the right amount of caution and practice, you could make it seem like you don’t have wings and you don’t have these really cool markings. You’d have to be careful, though. Glamour is meant to trick the mind as well as the eyes, but an illusion can be seen through if the viewer knew they were being tricked.”

“So, it’s possible?” she looked at me hopefully.

“We won’t know until we try it, but it could be possible,” I said slowly. “Unless Raiz meant illusions too. I don’t know much about Celestials or the Elder demons, but it could be that they’re natures were just too... purely one or the other to be hidden.”

“I’ll take it as an option right now,” she smiled softly before moving back to lean into me again. “I don’t know what to do, Mal. The thought of being in charge makes me want to run. The whole Sidhe or just the demons makes no difference. But the thought of running feels like I’m giving up and letting everyone down. Like I’m a disappointment.”

“Mary and Quinn want you to be happy, Fae. Yes, they have expectations, but I don’t think they’d push them on you if it only made you miserable,” I offered and held her tighter for a second. “If you told them that you didn’t want this, they’d understand.”

“And Naz?” she asked.

“You owe him no allegiance,” I scoffed. “He can go back to the Hell Pits with his demands for all they’re worth.”

“There’s an actual Hell?” she blurted, eyes wide.

“Uh... Kind of? The Hell Pits are kind of like lava pools, only made of a type of Hellfire,” I tried, struggling to remember my demon studies. “Honestly, I’m not the one to ask about anything demon related. I know the demons live in what is known as the Demon Lands. The Hell Pits are a part of it, kind of like the capital, but not? Demon studies were so confusing and boring, I kind of just tuned them out for the most part.”

“Why are they so confusing and boring?” she asked. “You’d think demons of all things would be interesting, right?”

“They are interesting, but the lessons are not,” I laughed. “What I know about them, I learned from lesser demons, like Ben.”

“Ben isn’t lesser anything,” she bristled.

“There is a social hierarchy in every culture, Fae. Demons aren’t any different. Fox demons are considered lesser demons. Demi are kind of on the cusp between lesser and common. The pure vampires are common, as are dream demons, which is why I still don’t buy that Naz is the Lord of his House,” I explained and she rolled her eyes, a smile pulling the sides of her mouth up slightly. “Then there’s greater demons, most of which are elemental, like the Fulmi and Ignus, lava and fire, or the Nefari, the ones the thrive in destruction of others, particularly humans.”

“Raiz mentioned the Sins.”

“Those are the elite. The strongest and most dangerous.”

“Let me guess; there’s seven of them?” she smirked.

“There were, yes. Now there are four.”

“Which ones?”

“I’m not sure. I know Gluttony ate Sloth, but I didn’t really pay attention. The Sins mostly stay in the Pits and don’t care much for things that don’t affect them,” I shrugged.

“He ate Sloth?”

“Gluttony, Fae. He eats everything.”

“Fair point,” she laughed. “Can we stay here forever?”

“If that’s what you want,” I kissed her cheek. “I’m replaceing I like not having to worry about Quinn glaring at me when I do this.”

I kissed her other cheek and she snorted and turned her head, so our lips met in a lingering kiss that I’ve been wanting to give her since completing our Bond.

“I prefer this, too,” she smiled when she pulled away.

“I love you, Fae,” I said and kissed her again.

“I love you too, Tinkerbell,” she giggled.

“That’s it!” I shouted and started tickling her, making her laughter echo through the trees.