I am Wolf
Chapter Forty - One

WOLF

I’m following behind Sasha; every step towards the outdoor cold room seems to have my beast on edge even more. The last thing I want is to have Captain Duche anywhere near her, even more now that I know what I know. He’s her... Fuck, I can’t even bring myself to think it, let alone say it.

The only thing going through my mind right now is that she just needs to talk to him; he’s leaving, he’s fucking leaving tomorrow, and I’ll never have to see his ugly mug again. Honestly, it’s not doing anything to calm my beast right now, but at least it will stop me from ripping him apart, for now, until he leaves and goes back to whatever hell hole he crawled out of.

Good fucking riddance.

The moment Sasha stopped, I suddenly looked up; I hadn’t even noticed that we were already right in front of the cold room door. It’s a big outdoor room where they keep all their meat; it’s pretty cold in there, hence why they put the body of the other white lighter in there.

My hands are tucked in the pockets of my hoodie, clenched tightly as I use every ounce of self-control to keep my wolf from pushing to the surface, the fucking dog tag around my neck a constant reminder of why my beast can’t break free.

Fuck, I hate this thing.

Knock, knock, knock.

Nothing.

I’m about to say something like, ‘He’s not here; let’s go,’ when the door suddenly swings wide open.

“What!?”

His abrupt bark as he suddenly stares down hard at Sasha has her stepping back, fumbling with her words. She looks down before beginning to fidget with her fingers, and my beast is instantly reffed up by his attitude; he’s got my girl feeling nervous, a clear indication of an effect he has on her that I fucking don’t like.

“Um, I- um...” She stutters, and I’m clenching my fists so tightly in the pockets of my hoodie, my claws extending and digging into my palms and drawing blood. Fuck, fuck, fuck.

Keep calm; just remember, tomorrow he leaves, and I’ll finally have Sasha all to myself.

“What is it, Sasha? Spit it out; I’m busy.” He snaps at her, his eyes narrowing, clearly annoyed as he stares at her. Sasha suddenly straightens, clears her throat, and looks up at him.

“Edith said you were leaving tomorrow.”

There’s a moment of silence as he furrows his brows in response,

“Yes, first thing in the morning, what about it?”

“Edith said I should come and talk to you before you leave.” Scoffing, he tilts his head,

“Of course she did...”

Another moment of silence stretches between them, and by this time, my beast has had enough of this little mind game he’s clearly playing with her.

“For fuck’s sake, Atlas. Just tell her whatever you need to tell her and get it over with so we can go.” I bark at him, my eyes staring daggers at him.

Looking over at me, he scowls hard before shifting his attention back toward Sasha,

“Your moldavite stone...”

“What about it?” She asks.

“I have all the fragments of it contained in one of my orbs; the moment I climb through a portal tomorrow, it will shatter, and all the fragments will no longer be protected.”

“Oh,” She says, her voice suddenly small.

“That moldavite stone is your birthstone; I’m guessing Lisbon must have taken it from your mother when she killed her.”

“H- how do you know it’s my birthstone?”

“Because I have one just like it.”

“Oh.” She responds.

Pulling something from his pocket, he holds up a green moldavite stone to her,

“We were born under the same star, so we share the same stone. Except mine isn’t shattered into a million pieces, and it doesn’t have a curse on it.” He says in a snarky tone, what’s up with this guy? First, he’s all up in her face, telling her they’re meant to be together, and now he’s treating her like she’s someone he can’t wait to get away from. I’m not complaining; I’m just fucking curious about what his game is.

“Edith also mentioned something about that, us being born under the same star, and...”

She says suddenly, looking down.

“And that’s all that matters; like I said, my orb will shatter the moment I climb into the witch’s realm. So I’ve been thinking of a way to contain the fragments of your stone so they all stay together.”

Nodding, she looks up at him,

“And have you figured anything out?”

“Still working on it.” He says, breaking eye contact with her.

“And the curse, I mean, if Lisbon’s gone into the witch’s realm, how do we break the curse she has on my stone and the curse she has on Wolf?”

Clenching his jaw, he looks from her to me, a twitch of blue in his eyes quickly masked the moment he looks back down at her.

“We’re going back to replace and capture Lisbon; she has to be brought before the King first. Once we do, and once she’s been through the proceedings of the Seelie court, I’ll see what I can do.”

“How long will all that take?” She suddenly snaps at him.

“Well, let’s see, she’s been in your world for about twenty years now; before coming here, she left a mess for us to clean up in our own realm, nearly creating a war to break out between the Seelie and Unseelie, she killed my mother, she killed your mother. That’s not even mentioning all the other accounts of treachery against her. Now that she’s finally gone back into the witch’s realm, we have to track her down, and I’m pretty sure she’s gone straight into the realm of darkness to hide amongst the Unseelie, so... it could be a while.”

“A while; what is that supposed to mean?” A sudden panic in her voice has my wolf whining in my head; he doesn’t like this; he doesn’t like it when she’s upset.

“Sasha, the curse on you and on him isn’t exactly on the top priority list of the King. Believe it or not, far worse accounts are being held against Lisbon than a curse or two.” He says as he narrows his eyes at me.

“So you won’t help us then?” Her voice suddenly breaks.

Smirking, Atlas cocks a brow at her,

“If you’re so eager to break the curse, then why don’t you come back into the witch’s realm and track Lisbon down yourself, or do you always rely on everyone else to do your dirty work?”

A threatening, deep growl suddenly reverberates from me as I stare him down,

“Over my dead body, if she goes, then I go.” Atlas instantly smirks as he looks at me,

“Yeah, well, that’s not going to happen. Sorry, no wolves allowed in the witch’s realm.”

“I could care less whether or not you want me to go into your precious realm, Atlas.

Atlas instantly looks up at me as he narrows his eyes,

“The only reason she would be able to get through is because she’s half a witch; you are a wolf, Wolf.” He drawls out. “My father has put an enchantment over our realm that repels wolves; you see, he isn’t much of a fan of things that bark at night.” Looking down at Sasha, he suddenly clenches his jaw, his brows furrow with instant regret the moment he must have realized what he just said. But he quickly breaks eye contact with her and looks away,

“You know what, I don’t have time for this; I have enough to deal with when I get home.”

“Yeah, like getting your ass kicked by your old man, we heard,” I growl, my wolf right there in my eyes. Fuck, it’s a miracle I’ve managed to hold him back this long with how much Atlas’s presence is irking him. All the while, Sasha is utterly silent as she stares at him. I can’t see her face, but I can feel her energy. Anger and hurt are the two strongest emotions swirling together like a tornado inside of her right now.

There’s a sudden tick in Atlas’s jaw; looking Sasha in the eyes, it’s as if there’s an unspoken conversation going on between them; suddenly breaking eye contact with her, he swallows hard.

“Whatever, I don’t need this.” And with that, he turns around and slams the door in her face, a sudden gasp escaping her lips.

I know I should want to kick his ass for being such a dick to my girl, but in some strange way, I prefer him treating her this way instead of treating her like he’s already claimed her. It’s hard, and I know it must be pissing her off, but it’s better this way; tomorrow, he’ll be gone.

Sasha slowly turns around to face me, swallowing a lump in her throat. Her eyes meet mine. What I see there is unexpected; her eyes are sympathetic and apologetic, laced with pain and sadness. It’s almost like she’s failed me somehow. My brows furrow as I watch her questioningly for a moment; I’m about to mind-link her when she breaks eye contact with me and looks down at the dog tag around my neck.

Clenching her jaw, tears suddenly begin shimmering behind her eyes; I can feel the anger and pain rolling off her in waves as she suddenly swings around and starts pounding on the door.

Two seconds later, Atlas suddenly yanks the door wide open as he comes right up in Sasha’s face, his eyes piercing hers as he shouts,

“What the fuck, Sasha. Just go away!” And that’s when my wolf loses it; there’s a thin line between being a dick to my girl and getting away with it and completely disrespecting her by being an asshole. And he’s just crossed it.

I instantly shove Sasha aside, gripping Atlas at the back of the neck as I yank him away from the doorway, tossing him down against the ground like a rag doll. Leaping up, he steadies himself; I can instantly see the surprise and shock on his face, his eyes immediately illuminating with electric blue, but I don’t give him a chance to start his witchy shit with me. Gripping him by the scruff of his shirt, I lift him up before delivering my fist to the side of his face hard. I hear the crunch of his jaw, and I hope I broke something.

Atlas hits the ground hard; I can smell the blood before seeing it. The moment he turns his head to glare at me, I see his bloody nose and blood coming from his mouth when he spits it out. His eyes immediately begin shimmering with power blue again, and he’s about to say something when I grip him around his throat. Lifting him up, I turn and take three big steps before slamming him up against the wall of the cold room with a loud thud. Tightening my grip around his throat, I watch his eyes widen in panic.

“You can’t fucking use your witchy bullshit on me if you can’t speak,” I growl.

I can vaguely hear Sasha yelling from beside me not to kill him, to stop, to let him go, but my beast is too far gone. It’s fucking painful to pull him back even the slightest. My eyes are piercing his, and all I see is red the moment I lift my hand into a tight fist beside my face, ready to launch it at his face again. I suddenly notice another white lighter witch out of my peripheral vision; the moment he steps out of the door, I hear him say,

“Hey guys, the dead are trying to get some sleep in here if you don’t mind...” The moment his eyes land on the scene before him, his eyes widen as he steps back with a “Whoah, dude.” His eyes are glued to me when he clears his throat. “Hey, big guy, um, so I completely get why you would want to beat the living shit out of Atlas; I really do; trust me, I’ve been there myself...”

“Not fucking helping, Noah.” Atlas wheezes; my grip around his throat makes it difficult for him to breathe, let alone speak.

“Yeah, sure, man. I mean... okay, let me try his again,” Noah blows out a breath before looking up at me again. “Hi, my name is Noah; we haven’t officially met yet, and as much as I don’t blame you for wanting to kick his ass, would it be too much to ask if you possibly don’t kill him. You see, we’re all in a great deal of trouble as it is, and our King kind of wants him back alive so that he can be the one to kill him. You could see how bad this would look if we take him back already dead, right?”

My jaw clenches as I slowly turn my head, breaking eye contact with Atlas to look at Noah. Blinking twice, I’m suddenly met with this shaggy, light brown-haired-looking guy with brown eyes; he looks like he spends most of his time surfing when he’s not being a witch. At least, that’s the vibe I’m getting. He in no way looks like he wants to attack me; in fact, he looks sympathetic to the fact that I want to kill Atlas. I like this guy.

I’m about to loosen my grip around Atlas when Sasha suddenly shouts from behind me,

“That’s it! I’ve had it. I’ve made up my mind; I’m going into the witch’s realm...” Both Atlas’s and my head whip over to look at her at the same time, both shouting in unison. “No!” as we stare at her. I’m met with broken eyes; tears run down her cheeks as she looks up at me and then at Atlas. Even when she’s infuriated and crying, she still looks so fucking sexy.

Giving us both a stern look, she suddenly spins on her heels and begins storming away fuck. My head whips back to glare at Atlas,

“This is all your fucking fault.” I bark before launching my fist into the wall just above his head so hard that the moment of impact sends a loud shudder through the wall, an instant crater left behind in the concrete, grey powder falling down around Atlas’s face as I suddenly drop him, spin around and go after Sasha.

I vaguely hear Noah mumbling something like, “Dude, look at this hole in the wall; that could have been your face, man. Can you stop pissing him off already?” But I’m suddenly running after Sasha, panic creeping into my chest. Fuck, why did I have to lose control like that? Fuck.

“Sasha, Sasha, wait!” I call out to her, but she’s marching toward the packhouse’s front door. Before she can get there, though, I’m right behind her as I grab her arm and spin her around. She’s scowling at me as she yanks her arm back, which instantly pisses me off as I stare her down.

“So what, you’re just gonna go, just leave and climb into a witch’s realm by yourself, is that it?”

“What other choice do we have?” She snaps at me.

“How about not to? I mean, what are you even thinking. What do you even know about the witch’s realm? You have a hard enough time keeping yourself safe in this world as it is.” I know I fucked up the moment those words came out of my mouth,

“So you think I can’t take care of myself, is that it?” She snaps.

I guess I’m too far gone because the next words that come out of my mouth deserve a foot up my ass.

“Well, come on then, warrior princess, let’s see what you’ve got.” Her brows instantly come together as she straightens up in disbelief,

“What?”

“You heard me,” I’m getting into a sparing position, tapping my chest hard as my eyes pierce hers. “If you can kick my ass, then you can go; how’s that?”

“I’m not doing this with you right now.” She snaps angrily at me.

“But you want to walk into a witch’s realm, so come on then, show me how you plan on defending yourself?” The worst part of it all is that I’m deadly serious because if she can spar with me and win, then she deserves to go into that realm. And there’s no fucking way I will allow her to win.

There’s an instant shimmer of her wolf in her eyes, and I instantly know we’re on. I smirk the moment she gets into position; my wolf is right there pushing to the surface, my skin tingling with anticipation.

She suddenly comes at me; she’s quick, but I’m faster. I instantly dodge out of her way and watch her swing back around, eyes narrowing on me. The art of a good fighter is control; don’t allow your emotions to get the better of you, and stay focused. Sasha’s emotions are all over the place right now.

The moment she comes at me again, I sidestep her at the last second, swinging around before suddenly sweeping out my leg. The moment she falls back and hits the ground with a thud, my hand is already around her throat. My body is pinning her down, and she can’t get up. Bringing my mouth close to her ear, I slowly growl, “You. Stay. Here.”

Getting up, I push myself off her as I extend my hand to help her up, but she doesn’t take it; she slaps it away, instantly jumping back up on the balls of her feet as she wipes away fresh tears against her cheeks. Our little showdown has gotten the attention of Edith; she’s standing right by the front door watching us warily. Even Captain Duche and his merry men have decided to step out of the cold room to watch us.

“Can you honestly spend the rest of your life with that curse around your neck?” She whimpers as her bottom lip quivers.

“I’ll adapt,” I mumble.

Nodding, she smirks as my answer suddenly irks her,

“And your wolf, will he adapt as well? Have you ever asked him how he feels about spending the rest of his life in confinement? Well, have you, or did you just decide for him, and to hell with the fact that you’re the last Ultima wolf left in the world?” Fresh tears shimmer behind her eyes.

I’m suddenly in her face, my eyes boring into hers. I can feel my beast rippling through me as I tighten my fists by my sides, pushing my forehead against hers. I feel like my entire world is about to come crashing down at any moment.

“Don’t you do it; don’t you dare leave me and go running off into some place where I can’t follow. I won’t let you; don’t ask me to let you go.”

Lifting her hand to gently touch my cheek, her sobs suddenly fill the air between us as she looks up at me,

“Wolf, I can’t be the reason you never shift into your beast again; I love you too much to be that selfish.”

Clenching my jaw, the sudden ache in my chest begins ripping me apart, piece by piece.

“Loving you is killing me right now.”

Taking a step back, I keep my eyes trained on the ground before spinning around and marching off in the direction of my bike.